


Guide Me Into Death

by KagamineLify



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Angst, Eventual Smut, Exalted Plains, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Grief/Mourning, Magic, NSFW, Past Relationship(s), Post Trespasser, Romance, Scarred, Sexual Content, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Smut, she needs help, someone save the inquisitor, update tags as needed
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-10
Updated: 2017-06-10
Packaged: 2018-11-12 08:05:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,955
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11157714
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KagamineLify/pseuds/KagamineLify
Summary: It wasn't always like this for Falathiel Lavellan. She didn't always live in a cabin by herself in the Exalted plains, roaming the world to find a way to save her lover from himself. She didn't always wake up in the middle of the night, clutching her chest in pain as she wept for a love that was no longer there. It wasn't easy, but she made it work in her own messed up way. With the help of her friends, she might be able to get to the root of her problems.





	Guide Me Into Death

**Author's Note:**

> So, this is my first time writing a fic in AGES, especially publishing it, so I'm a tad bit nervous. If you guys like the story, please give it a kudos and tell me if you want me to continue it!

Falathiel Lavellan awoke with a start. The elf’s vibrant red hair fell in curls around her face and stuck to her pale skin. Her breathing came out in hurried pants as she clasped tightly onto her silk bed sheets. Solas. The sharp-eared elf had been in her dreams again, watching her afar from a distance. Falathiel’s eyes shimmered with tears as she choked back a cry. Even though these dreams had been going on for months, it never got any easier. To reach out with her nimble fingers and to never touch him...It always broke her heart the same. The elf slowly relaxed her grip on her comforter and took a deep breath. She slid out of her bed, grabbed her wolf pelt, and with shaky steps, walked out of her cottage to step outside.

It could barely be considered dawn with only a few shreds of light peaking through the trees. The forest was full of lush life. Vines draped around the vibrant emerald leaves of the trees and spiral downwards. The sound of cool water flowing through a stream into a pool of water provided a cold drink for the Halla. The birds chirped quietly and the crickets filled the silence. Ever since the disbandment of the Inquisition, the redhead had taken to living in the Exalted Plains. Part of her decision to live here stemmed from the Dalish Clan that lived not too far, and there was an abundance of Elven ruins nearby. She still kept in contact with her few close friends, ready to raise their sword arm for her, and was feverishly working on a plan to stop her lover from ending the world.

Falathiel closed the door behind her and walked off into the woods. The elf pulled her pelt closer to her neck, reveling in the warm in brought her. She had awoken one morning to find the beautiful pristine ivory pelt on her doorstep. There was no note or sign as to where it came from, but it faintly smelled of a familiar earthy scent. Since that day, she had taken to incorporating it into her daily outfit. The soft white pelt accented her silver shoulder pads and the rest of her armor. Her satchel that slung around her body carried her elf root and necessities.

She didn't know why, but walks in this lush forest calmed her. Her cabin was hidden away in the heart of this forest for that exact reason. The redhead glided down the stone steps of the small hill that led to her cottage. Falathiel eventually ended up at a grand statue of a wolf. Moss and vines clung to the statue, a single crack against its heart.

“Dareth Shiral, Fen’Harel,” she spoke solemnly as she took a seat against its cool side. “I wish you didn't haunt my dreams. I wish I hadn't…” _‘fallen in love with you.’_ The unspoken words were on the tip of her tongue, but she didn't have the heart to say them. Not when she didn't regret them. “My dreams are rarely peaceful because of you, Solas. It hasn't been easy. Just once, please, let me have a restful night.” The lithe elf stroked her fur as a cool breeze kissed her skin, almost as if a response to her plea. She slowly blinked, a sudden wave of weariness overtaking her and eased her breath as she succumbed to slumber.

* * *

_”Inquisitor!”_ A faint voice shouted. The lithe elf mumbled incoherently in response. She was in between worlds and wasn't able to awaken from her slumber. A strong, calloused hand gripped her shoulder and shook her to no avail. The stranger sighed and looked to their mabari, who barked and immediately took to the inquisitor's lap, subsequently going to work and licking the elf’s face.

Falathiel awoke with a start, her face coated in a thick layer of slobber. The redhead gagged in disgust as she hurriedly tried to rid her face of the slobber.

“What in the world-...Cullen? What are you doing here?” She asked with a hint of confusion. What was he doing here? The blonde stood with a smile as his lip turned, his scar prominent on his lips. Cullen had taken to discarding his old armor for a simple leather jacket paired with a glimmering pauldron and finely woven pair of slacks. His sword hung across his lower back, shining in the light. A pair of black leather boots adorned his feet. He chuckled as he deftly put his ebony gloves back on.

“I hope I didn't interrupt your sleep, Inquisitor. My sincerest apologies. Divine Justinia was beginning to worry since she hadn't heard from you in a fortnight, and I had happened to be around the area, so she asked me to come check on you,” he promptly informed her.

“I...haven't been sleeping well. It's hard to get a good night's rest these days,” Falathiel chuckled. She didn't need to say what it was that made it difficult. Everyone knew. The former commander took notice and nodded his head. _‘How did Solas affect the inquisitor so greatly?’_ He wondered. The pale elf had never been the same since she entered the eluvian to rescue the Dread Wolf. She had returned empty handed and has refused to talk about what had happened.

“I...could help with that. I mean, my sister taught me some remedies for sleeping better after the Circle collapsed,” he scratched his head. “If you're okay with trying them, that is. After all that's happened, inquisitor, you of all people deserve a good night's rest,” he smiles warmly, extending his hand to help her up. Falathiel placed her small hand in his and was gently lifted up from her spot.

“I think I'd like that. Some sleep would be greatly appreciated,” the elf smiled in return. “And please, call me Falathiel. I haven't used the title of inquisitor since Halamshiral.” She inclined her head to the cottage and he took her hint, following after her. In the distance, an ivory wolf bared his teeth, snarling in discontent as the scene unfolded in his view.

* * *

Falathiel placed her wolf pelt gently down onto her end table and turned back to inspect Cullen’s work. The commander was hard at work. A pot on the stove was boiling with some elfroot and other leaves she could not distinguish. _‘A tea perhaps?’_ The elvish clan near her home had tried all they could to help her, but, to no avail, none of their remedies worked.

“My mother used to make this tea for me as a child. She passed it onto my sister so whenever I was feeling restless, she'd make this tea for me. I also started on breakfast since I thought you'd enjoy that. You've lost weight, inqui...Falathiel.” The commander blushed faintly at his blunder. He hadn't meant to mess up like that.

“Since it's only myself here, I forget to eat sometimes. I'm usually out all day exploring ruins,” she responded thoughtfully. The commander turned to look at her in shock.

“Inquisitor! You can't skip meals like that! I'm surprised Dorian hasn't reprimanded you for that,” he shouted. How could she be so careless? “Falathiel, I have made up my mind. I shall stay with you until you learn to take better care of yourself.” Falathiel’s eyes widened in utter disbelief.

“What? I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself! Besides, don't you have the sanctuary to take care of?” She was an adult and perfectly capable of keeping herself in good health. She had saved the world and killed Corypheus herself!

“I had already made arrangements for someone to take care of the sanctuary until I return. I asked the favor of Cassandra and she complied since she knew I couldn't trust anyone else with the task. She kept me in line when I was going through withdrawals,” a tight line went across the soldier's face. It was difficult for him to talk about those times. The elf sighed and turned to look the other way.

“I don't have another bed, but I'll go ahead and buy another one so-” a hand swiftly gripped her wrist. A flash of pain swept over Cullen’s honey colored eyes, but only for a moment.

“I'll do it, Inquisitor. You don't have to trouble yourself for me.” His eyes swept over to her amputated arm and back to her face. As soon as she had made the connection, the fiery elf snarled and yanked her hand away.

“I shouldn't trouble myself because I'm crippled? A waste of space? I know that's what's really on your mind,” she bit back. As soon as the words left her lips, she regretted them. The former templar’s eyes widened in shock. “I...I'm sorry. I didn't meant it like...that. I just...I'll leave you to your devices,” she whispered as she walked off. How could she have let herself have an outburst like that? Especially towards one of her close friends. 

“Falathiel.” She didn't dare look back, but stopped in her tracks. “I think your imperfections make you shine more than anything. They show that you're brave and strong, even without the mark. Not just anyone could make the sacrifices you have, Inquisitor.” How could he be that nice with the way she just treated him? The elf turned back and opened her mouth to speak.

“After breakfast, we can head to Val Royeaux and buy you a bed. Josephine made sure I kept my discounts, even after the disbandment of the Inquisition,” she spoke tentatively. He contemplated it for a moment, but the indecisiveness quickly left his eyes.

“Of course, Falathiel. I'm about done with breakfast,” he nodded, giving her a small smile. The redhead flushed with embarrassment as she helped set the table. Not even an hour with him and he was giving her conflicting feelings. How could he stand to be around her when she was so damaged?

_‘Vhenan, humans and elves do not mix. They are beneath us,’_ a ghostly voice caressed her ear. The elf froze midway placing a fork down. That...That couldn't have been Solas. It must have been a hallucination. She looked around her surroundings and pursed her pale lips.

“Did you hear something?” The redhead placed a fork down while looking up at Cullen.

“Hear something? Besides fluffy snoring, no,” he responded back.

Falathiel stared back down at the table, her eyebrows furrowed. She shook her head and went back to setting the table. Her mind was certainly playing tricks on her. All this time alone was finally catching up to her and making her go crazy.

_‘Vhenan, it isn't healthy to lie to yourself. It's most unbecoming,’_ the same ghastly voice whispered close to her neck. Falathiel swatted her neck and looked around frantically. Okay, she definitely heard something that time. The elf turned on her heels and grabbed her staff, quickly exiting the cabin. Her emerald eyes darted back and forth, surveying the luscious green lands around her.

_‘Nothing. Why can't I find anything? It has to be here!’_ As she listened intently to the surrounding woods, a bush rustled in the distance. Falathiel readied her staff, an ice spell ready to freeze the enemy in place, when a nug jumped out of its leaves. The redhead sighed and slapped her forehead. It could have been the effects of being the inquisitor for so long, but she was starting to get a little too paranoid. Just as she was about to sign it off as being skeptical, a pair of hands landed on her shoulders. Lavellan screamed, immediately whipping around and caste Winter’s grasp on her attacker, freezing them in their spot.


End file.
